Feeling Sad

So today was not a good day for me. It was my off day. I was sooo depressed/sad today. I woke up feeling fat today, I may not have looked like it but I sure felt like it. To solve that problem I did 50 squats for my squat september and some bicep curls. Doing that really quick workout and haveing a big glass of water afterwards really helped! I felt 110% better and felt skinny going to school! That shows you that you do get happiness after you workout and you do feel a lot better as well. But even though I felt good about my body I still didnt feel good. Throughout my day at school I started to get more and more depressed. It all started with this guy in my first period class that didnt want to work with me on this little assignment that my teacher gave us. Yeah sure he isnt the best looking guy around and he is pretty immature but it still hurt. Forcing me to be the only one without a partner and my teacher was okay with that saying fine you'll work alone. So I did, I got the assignment done and I think I did pretty good with it but throughout the whole period I felt unwanted. I was sitting by myself being quiet and isolated from the rest of the class. Okay I know what you guys are gonna say sometimes being alone is better or cheer up and some of that stuff that puts a smile on my face and the stuff you guys say does put a smile on my face. But this goes deeper. For once i finally understood what some people in my school felt or people with depression felt. For once I felt like the girl who does self harm and feels like everyone hates her because we all want to be accepted by people. Dont lie I know you guys somewhat want acceptance in your life and not being accepted, well hurts. We all are searching for acceptance in the world whether its from our family, friends or even ourselves. People dont understand that actions and words do hurt someone and can change someones mood drastically like it changed mine. Even the littlest thing can upset someone and some people just dont get it. They dont get that words affect people in so many ways and some people dont care! They will keep bringing you down until, well until you give up. But this is what i say to those people, FUCK YOU. After school i realized that im not gonna let these people get the satisfaction of seeing me upset, I am going to put a big huge smile on my face and walk the hallways like a runway with my head up! I'm going to surround myself with the people that make me happy. The people that put a smile on my face and doesnt bring a negative attitude around me. And dont think like you are alone either, thats how I felt today, because you are not alone. You are never alone, there's always that one person that cares enough to listen and just listen. That person who doesnt criticize you or judge you. But listens to what you have to say. I found that person today and whenever I'm upset and dont feel in the right mood I'm going to think of that person and talk to that person knowing that someone cares. I care, i care about all of my fitfam fitties. I care if you guys are feeling down or unmotivated because I want you guys to know that I am here for you all. I dont want anyone to feel alone, and I never want to feel the way I did today and trust me I dont plan on it. For the rest of the week its all smiles on this pretty face of mine :) OH and one last thing! 

xoxo GettinginShapex